“Life is a dance, you learn as you go,” according to a classic country tune sung by John Michael Montgomery. It’s true that we can’t put life on hold until we think we know it all, so we might as well jump in with both feet, take some risks, be adventurous. As the song continues, we learn that the crooner avoids taking a risk and misses the opportunity to “dance” with his teenage crush.
What I am proposing in this blog is that not only life but marriage is a dance. As someone who enjoys partner dances (such as waltz, rumba, tango and swing), I have discovered a number of parallels between dancing with a partner and Christian marriage.
And I’m not alone in my observations. Moveir Ballroom posts this explanation for “Why Ballroom Dance?” on its website: At Moveir, ballroom is much more than dancing — it’s a way to build relationships, appreciate different personalities, and ultimately love on people. There are parallels between the technical aspects of dance and the skills in relating to each other.
To begin exploring marriage through this lens of dance, consider leading and following. Traditionally in partner dancing, the man is the leader and the woman is the follower. Perhaps that makes modern women feel “second class.” But is following really any less significant than leading? In the movie Take the Lead starring Antonio Banderas, the dance instructor tells his students that each role (leading and following) requires the same strength, energy and effort. In other words, it takes “two to tango,” as the saying goes. Without both a leader and a follower, there is no dance. Though the roles are different, they are equally important to the dance.
I would propose that the same is true about the husband’s and wife’s roles in Christian marriage. Scripture assigns spiritual leadership of the household to the husband. But that does not discount the value of the wife. Christianity affirms the value of both male and female, created in the image of God. Paul instructs men to “love your wives, just as Christ loved the church….” (Eph. 5:25, NIV) That single verse ascribes great responsibility to the husband and great value to the wife.
Both life and marriage can be a beautiful dance — full of adventure, intimacy and joy — this is how our Creator intended us to live!
If you’re ready to step out and start dancing, then stick around and read more, or subscribe so you don’t miss future posts. If anything you read here resonates with you, please add a comment and share the posts with others.
Copr. 2009 MarriageDance
What a great metaphor for male/female relationships! Yes, there is equal value in each role and both are necessary for the dance to take place. And while dancing solo is possible, it’s just not as much fun.
I look forward to more!
What an awesome way to compare marriage and dance. What you’ve said is so true, especially when little dancers (kids) arrive on the scene. It is so important for husband and wife to “dance” together in harmony for all the other things in their lives to work out well.
This is very good. It is 100% accurate. Nice to see someone with knowledge of the bible who can transform it into practical life. Hopefully others will understand.
Dance and marriage have such a beautiful synergy. If you continue in the reading of Ephesians 5 you will notice that the message continues with “and let the wife see to it that she respects her husband” (Eph. 5:33). As in dance the woman must understand that the dance can only be as beautiful, graceful and lovely as it comes with a respect to allow the Husband to lead and support while the love comes from the husband in recognizing what the wife significantly contributes in the beauty of the dance of life.